I’ve Been Branded by My Bra

I’m a runner. I have breasts. Big ones.

I know I can’t be the only one, but to shop for running bras or most any running apparel, you’d think that I was a freak of nature. Those stretchy, racer back, pull over numbers that they actually have the audacity to call sports bras or jog bras (for Petes’ sake!) are simply not sufficient to do the work of a real woman. Now, if you are woman more modestly endowed, please don’t take offense – I am secretly envious, and any snarky remarks by me are simply frustration and jealousy – don’t take it personally.

As a new runner, you will be advised that the only thing you really need to get started is a pair of good shoes. You do need shoes, but a good supportive bra is equally, if not more important. In the first month or two, the distances you are likely to run may not require more than a pair of decent cross trainers or walk/run shoes with moderate support and cushioning. But your breasts – they will take on a life of their own from the first step out the door. All Baywatch babe fantasies aside, running while slinging those girls around is not a pretty sight.

As someone who started running and continues to train and coach on behalf of breast cancer causes, it would be negligent to allow you to run with boobs-a-bouncin’ causing damage to delicate breast tissue. Don’t do it. If you wear a C cup or larger (and statistics tell us most women are wearing the wrong size bra, so you should probably get fitted by a pro) then get thee a specialty high impact sports bra designed for the bigger bust. My personal recommendation: the Moving Comfort (brand) Fiona (model).

I like this one for several reasons. First, it is impressively sturdy. I’m pretty sure King Arthur might have issued this to his knights of the round table as impenetrable armament. Second, it has straps that are adjustable with Velcro. You put it on and hoist those girls high and firmly in place, and you get a perfect fit every time. Third, it is made of performance fabric that wicks moisture away from your body and is quick drying.

So here’s the one drawback…seams. There are a lot of seams, understandably, since this is a miracle of engineering. However, with more seams come more opportunities for chafing. Oh yeah – I actually have scars – burn marks my bra left because I was too ignorant to use BodyGlide (looks like stick deodorant, but is actually an amazingly easy, reliable way to avoid what looks like rug burn in the darndest places). But I am proud to wear the brand of my bra. It is a small price for the all it’s done for me. Now if I can just get some sort of sponsorship deal from Moving Comfort…

Make no mistake, this bra is not pretty (and for the love of God, ladies, please don’t even think about wearing a sports bra as a top!), but then I figure I have already done enough to discourage my husband’s advances when I return from my run a sweating, heaving, malodorous mess. He is not going to stick around to get a peek at the heavy duty support garments. The good news is because of the run, I clean up pretty good after the run, for which my husband is very appreciative.

Do you have any good bra recommendations? Please let us know in the comments section.

Keeping the Faith

“The idea that the harder you work, the better you’re going to be is just garbage. The greatest improvement is made by the man or woman who works most intelligently.”

Bill Bowerman, running coach

Um…OK, Bill.

I wonder what my chances are of getting good at running? I’m a late bloomer, so what hope do I have that I will ever break a 10 minute mile?

I read somewhere that as a new runner (even at the ripe old age of 44) I can look forward to 6-7 years of improvement. That’s good news, I guess. I may make a rspectable showing before the inevitable ravages of time and gravity completely overwhelm me.

I hate reading posts on running boards where “slow” runners complain about their 9 min/mile. I feel as sorry for them as I do for those fat heifers weighing in at 135 lbs! Get real people! If I were only 15 lbs overweight, I’d be grateful – -do you hear that? Grateful!

Maybe I’m just a little bitter this week because my runs have left me feeling like I am wearing lead boots. I’m not especiallly winded, my legs feel fine, but there is a distinct sluggishness, a heavines I can’t quite name. I look forward to getting out on the road, but once there, I can’t wait to be done.

I’m sure this feeling will pass.

I am pleased that I have actually inspired a number of people to take up running. Does it sting that everyone one of them is almost instantly better at it than I am? Yes – a bit. But I guess that’s just another character building opportunity my sport affords me.